A lot can happen in a year.

Just one year.

It has been exactly one year since when I found myself going to Japanese Campus Crusade for Christ, Student Impact the youth group of Christian students community.

Last year, my brand new friends I randomly met on campus invited me to come to their farewell party.

Those friends were already close to me and I liked them so much that I saved the day immediately.

I had class until 6:10 but the party was starting at 6:30 in a different town where it takes me at least 50min to get.

I remember I was confused and nervous when I was going inside, I didn't even know which floor I was going lol

I also remember I was feeling kind of like an outsider since I knew only 5 of the whole crowd, even though everyone especially the American Stinters were so friendly and welcoming.

I didn't really try to make friends too.

just like how I was doing when I ran into Rachel for the first time.

That was how my first time at Student Impact was like.

Obviously, I didn't expect to keep coming back there.

Today was the day again.

This year, we wanted to have a party not only for those American missionary internships but also those friends we got to know from school or other community.

So we can celebrate and be thankful for our friendships.

"Friends Night"

We invited more than 50 ppl then just spend a night together.

I planned this party with Shiho, my lovely new Kohai and Rachel, my amazing discipler/best friend.

I have been helping this community as MC/facilitator of youth group(bible study) as well.

I'm trying to commit and contribute to this community as much as I can this year.

Yes, I somehow have come back to CCC and officially became a member of them.

Life is full of surprises. haha

To be honest, finding this community changed my life completely.

Before I met Rachel and Trevor at school accidentally?, and before I made myself going to CCC student Impact,

I had no Christian friends who understod my world and meaning of prayer.

Although I have many good friends in school and I was never bored with them, sometimes I felt all alone.

My best friend in California, Jackie is a strong christian. But pretty much she was the only christian friend I could ask for prayer when I need it.

I did not try to find one in Japan. I expected no one to be christian.

I was just being an ordinary Japanese girl who follow Japanese-odd-multi-religions-mixed-culture.

I had my faith right inside of me still but I was just afraid of telling the world what it is.

In the very beginning of my sophomore year, my life got a lot harder.

I started getting anxiety and having hard time praying.

Of course, I had no one who could pray for me either.

But CCC was actually the community I could share my prayer request for the first time in Japan.

I still remember the moment I shared my complicated feeling with Marina, a great friend of mine from CCC, for the first time and it made me very emotional.(She just told me that she didn't expect me to be this crazy at that time cuz I was kind of depressed when we first met lol)

During summer, all the Stinters were back in America, so was Rachel.

I sometimes called and texted Rachel and Shun and shared my prayer request.

Because they were the only ones who i could share my concern or worry comfortably.

One day, Shun told me to rely on other Japanese students in CCC more, like ask them to pray for them.

Firstly, I hesitated.

I had never had any Japanese christian friend.

Everyone I know who had been praying over me was always foreigner.

So, I was very comfortable to talk about that kind of spiritual topic in English with foreign people, but not Japanese ppl.

That was absolutely out of my comfort zone.

I just did not know how to do it.

But I tried.

I texted Megumiko, also one of my very first friends from CCC , to pray for me.

It was maybe a little awkward lol

But she was nice enough to accept it. lol

I think that was the time I started being closer to this community.

Last fall, when some stinters from last year and new stinters came to Tokyo, I found myself keep going to their bible study and started being an official member.

I was a planning member of Christmas event and I shared a christmas message in front of 70 students.

I sometimes be a translator at events.

Now I'm a little more comfortable to pray in front of everyone.

I started doing MC almost every week at Youth Group.

Now, I am already one of the oldest students in the community and making sure I'm making the commitment.

Life could be changed within a year.

One year ago, I was almost depressed and stressed out because I was trying to follow God and letting go something I love like crazy .

Wondering if I can keep living the life full of stresses and challenges, as I watched trains passing by.

God kept whispering me,

"I have even greater gifts for you. not only one. I have so much to give you. because I love you. I can make your life better. You have to live the life I give you. So, juts let it go. Its gonna be alright. Trust me."

I wanted to trust him.

But I was so scared of letting my world being changed.

Eventually, I let it be.

Surprisingly, my life got a lot better afterwords.

So many ppl told me I started looking happier.

Today, I was smiling and laughing at the top of my lungs with my brothers and sisters in CCC.

They make me happy and I hopefully make them happy.

They pray for me, wish me well and I do the same for them.

We inspire and encourage each others.

Having a community that works together for God was life changing thing for me.

It made my life so much better.

I am very thankful for those ppl in CCC.

But more than anything, I am thankful for God.

Without God, I would have nothing to be thankful for.

He always has a big plan for me.

I want to make sure I will always follow that and obey him.

In the next one year, I might be changed again.

But I know He is always with me and the amazing CCC family is always there for me, I am not afraid of any change anymore.

Lastly, I want to be thankful to the stinters I met this past one year.

People love beautiful things.

When they talk about beauty, some may talk about pretty faces, others might talk about kindness of heart. Or maybe something with glitter, shiningsparkle, fancy thing that everyone get excited to see, like a jewelry from Tiffany.

When I was 16, I wanted to be someone beautiful.

But I was not sure what makes ppl beautiful or the definition of beautiful woman.

I was jealous of ppl who were being called "pretty" or "beautiful"

I sometimes thought skinny blue eyed blonde chicks are the most beautiful human kind. There's no way that I could be them.

Now, I think beautiful ppl are the ones who follow God's voice.

the one who trust God and never give up on living the life He prepared for them, no mater how hard it is sometimes.

I thought like that as I see the stinters working for God in Tokyo to spread the news and change the world.

Have you looked at their eyes?

Have you seen them praying quietly but also strongly?

Have you seen how beautiful they are when they are hearing and seeing God with their hearts?

It was the most beautiful thing in this world.

God's love was shining on them.

Thank you Stinters.

You guys are so beautiful.

Love you.

2017.06

Friends Night

これも成長

Hello June